Sarcasm with a side of optimism.

Hashing.

"We have a virrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgin!"

She held onto that r like it was her own. And she was describing me, a hashing virgin.

I wasn't going to go today. The whole area was under a severe thunderstorm watch from 5pm to 10pm with reports of 58 mph wind gusts and 3/4" hail west of this area. Too bad the weather moves east, and this hot dog shaped cloud was coming our way at 25 mph. I had to be at Alan's house by 6:50pm at the latest, and Rich was expecting me. The ever-so-logical Sam advised against it, but did I listen to him? (Do I ever?) Nope. It was dark outside, but there was no precipitation. Sometimes the rain skips this area. It happens all the time. So I didn't hesitate, and grabbed a bottle of Gatorade and went downstairs. Of course, opening the garage door also unlocked the gates of hell and in the 5 seconds it took to get downstairs, the sheets of rain were so thick, it was hard to see the other side of the street.

I was satisfied with this outcome, because earlier, I went dumpster diving in the 110 degree heat, and I got some GOOD stuff. :) Even though used bed pillows fell on me, and I had to kind of touch discarded clothes (gross), it was all good. But I digress!

At 6:40pm, the rain relented into a light drizzle. The backroads were flooded, and there were plenty of branches in the road. Signal lights lost power, and I even passed an ambulance on the way to Alan's house. He lives on this very narrow and winding road that you have no business being on unless you live in the area. I passed his place three times, and the fourth time, Richard was standing off the side of the road. I think he was very surprised to see me because any sane person would have said, "Screw this!" Which is exactly what Laura did.

There were a lot of people gathered at the foot of the hill, mostly older, with graying hair. They looked the part of the geritol crowd, but they most definitely were young in spirit. Parking was extremely limited, and one guy pipes up, "Ya got four wheel drive on that thing? You can park down there, and it's flat once you get past the trees."

Excuse me? Oh, HELL no. Yes, I have four wheel drive, but the last thing I want to be doing is sliding around in the grass in an array of trees getting all sorts of scratches and dents in my car. And yes, I KNOW I drive an Xterra, and I'm supposed to be cool with these so-called rugged activities, but you listen and listen well: mud is as far as it goes.

So instead, I parked off the side of the road in a quicksand pile of mud. A silent thank-you to Dad who insisted I get a 4WD vehicle.

We congregate at the top of the hill and the host (who sets the trail) makes an announcement. A lot of hooting and hollering follows reminiscent of fraternity rally calls which means it was completely unintelligible. At least to my ignorant ears. The pack takes off running down the slick grassy hill. It was still raining. There was still thunder and lighting. What a bunch of crazy fools!

We reach the first sign at the foot of the bridge. Each sign represents a split in the trail. Only one path is the correct path. The pack deliberates for a second, splits and a few seconds later, there's some yelling of "On! On!" which translates to, "We are on the right trail!" At this point, if you're by the sign, you're supposed to put a scratch in it for the walkers, so they know which way to go. More running through trails. I'm thinking about ticks and poison ivy as I'm moving through brush and brambles, and dodging tree branches while navigating through slick rocks, puddles of water, mud, gnarly roots, and tree trunks across the trail. It's nothing like running aimlessly on a treadmill. It's more like hopping and leaping, so you get into a rhythm with your knees high and up-up-up, instead of striding across-across-across. We went down a trail in which we were greeted by a gigantic "X", so we yell "BT" which stands for "bad trail" which translates into, "Don't follow us, go the other way!" The other group that tried the other path will eventually run into a trail marker which is a dot on the trail itself, or on a tree, and you'll hear "On! On!" and try to follow the sound of that group. Which means cutting through parts that are not trail, and probably were never meant to be.

I was running at a slow, but steady pace chatting it up with another newbie cop who seemed to be interested. What a great time to talk about other nature related events like going to Luray last weekend with my BOYFRIEND! That did the trick. We stuck together though, and followed a guy who called himself Misguided Dick (don't ask) and was familiar with the trail.

We ran alongside a canal, then by the river stopping at several scenic overlooks. Great Falls is gorgeous. There were a couple of insane kayakers practicing in the white water. Eventually, we popped back out and were intercepted by Richard. We didn't do Swamp Trail, but we covered everything else, so figure maybe 5 miles of trail running was accomplished. It was awesome. I see how people can get addicted to this, and I had a great time even in what Richard characterized as the worst conditions given the heat wave and the storms.

When we got back, there were sandwich trays from Costco laid out. There was plenty of beer and wine, but I stuck with Gatorade and water. I don't know how you could slam down a beer after exercising, but the smell of alcohol was making me feel queasy. Rich started in once we settled down to eat about the open mic thing. That perked up interest in the group, and I was asked a lot about music and my background in it. Told them that I do covers, and named a few of the groups. Pearl Jam got the biggest response, and I figured this would be a good test audience. I finished a half of a sandwich and asked the lady of the house if she'd mind if I gave the piano a whirl. She didn't. They had an old Kimball piano that was slightly out of tune, but the acoustics of the room were forgiving and my voice was amplified and carried well, so that made up for it. They were floored at my rough cut of "Elderly woman..." I was slightly rattled because it's always a little unnerving to play and sing for strange people, so I know that the song definitely needs some work. But I'm hoping to do it in a couple of weeks. We'll see.

Out of Rich's almost 10 years of hashing, he noted that this was the first time they've ever had piano at a hash! I'm making a name for myself!

I had a great time, and I'm looking forward to doing it again next week. And what made my night even better was receiving a call from Craig once I stepped out of the shower!

It's late. Need sleep. Waking up early tomorrow to knock out a 1600m swim. :)

posted by v @ 10:43 PM