Sarcasm with a side of optimism.

Jess's big day

I'm reminded just how weird it is to be dating half of an identical twin set each time we go back to Atlanta. Most of the time, I forget that Craig has a brother, let alone an IDENTICAL one. See?

The week started crazy for me, first having to be in Denver in the beginning, then Atlanta in the end for a 3-day wedding celebration. His sister was getting married, and it's a big deal since there's only one girl out of the siblings. Their relatives were flying in from all over. I packed my small suitcase with only nice clothes since I knew I'd be seen, but it didn't occur to me that it would be his family the entire weekend! Kara dropped us off, and we had twenty minutes to spare before our flight boarded. We got there on time, picked up the rental car from a rental equivalent of Eastern Motors (motors) which is a super ghetto and shady venue in case you didn't know, and were on our way to Alex's house. She graciously hosted us for the three days we were there.

The next day, Craig got up and left for what he thought was a pre-Wedding reunion with some west coast family members, but in actuality turned out to be a communist labor camp at his Dad's house. Alex and I went real estate prospecting in Conyers and were promptly disappointed as we were surrounded by confederate flag waving toothless hillbillies. There was a cheap carwash nearby, so we did a quick drive through (stupid WHITE cars...) and as they were hand drying Alex's car, I pointed out that the guy on her side had no teeth. For real. Made it back in time for the rehearsal dinner which I didn't think I was invited to initially since I'm not part of the wedding party, but it was for out of towners too. That's where I met everybody. I saw Jess first in an Ann Taylor dress. I remember that dress because it was my first choice to wear to the wedding. I emailed the link to Craig to get his opinion ("It looks like a tablecloth."), which he now denies ever saying. (I went with a silk Banana Republic floral dress instead.) Then I saw Craig's dad, and a bunch of other people. We went upstairs and stayed in the hallway to meet and greet people. The out of towner relative were greeting and catching up with one another. Craig had to run an errand. As he leaves, Derek comes up to say hello to people. One relative with a camera insists that we get together to take a picture since obviously we're dating. So we're still standing like, 5 feet apart from each other and waddle in to make it 3 feet, then a respectful 12 inches. (That's all they're gonna get.) Derek sighs, "It's not even worth explaining." Smile. Click.

They had reserved a room at Maggiano's where we were served a fabulous three course meal. Even the mafioso italian side of the family would be impressed! It was a nice dinner until Jess and Roger got heckled into telling everyone how they met and their lovestory. Then the heckling roast began!

After the dinner, we stopped by Derek's place to hang out for a while. They have this one cousin who looks a lot like them, it's totally weird. I guess the probability of having similar looking relatives is higher when you are coming from a purely caucasian family. The roommates (high school/college friends) were nowhere to be found. We made our way back to Alex's pretty late. She was already asleep.

Overnight, it poured. You could hear the drops pounding on the siding. Ping. Ping. PLOP. Well, isn't it GREAT that this is an outdoor wedding?? We had volunteered the night before to help with the set up, not fully knowing what that meant. When we arrived at the chateau after a nice shower (and no breakfast), we were confronted by a puddle ridden patio and a huge tarp with all the tables and chairs stacked beneath it. Oh. This is what you mean by set up. After a couple of hours of manual labor, we were drenched with puddle splash and sweat. It's only April and it's already friggin hot in Atlanta. It was slowly starting to come together.

The venue was beautiful. I don't have any pictures of the interior of the house (think: museum, old money), but the exterior and the well manicured grounds were extraordinary. If nothing else, at least Jess and Roger will have amazing photos.




It was nice to be there to see Jess and Roger's wedding. They truly have something real and meaningful. It just makes sense seeing them together, and I couldn't imagine it any other way. They're both quirky, yet complimentary. I remember I was pretty scared to meet them the first time because a sister's criticism is second only to the mother's, though equally harsh. It wasn't weird to hang out with them. It wasn't weird to be the brother's girlfriend. And it was kind of fun, actually! We've seen them several times in between, and stayed with them a couple of times when we visit and it's nice. It's kind of weird to think of them as wife and husband now, because in my head it's just...Jess and Roger, a statement of fact.

And Stephanie was very sweet too. She should get a gold medal for bridesmaiding. I've heard a lot about her and seen plenty of pictures since she's Jess's best friend. You could tell she really cared about Jess and that they had a sisterly connection.

It's nice to be truly happy for someone.

Come to think of it, I think I am fake-happy for people most of the time. (During that time of fake-smile-and-nod, I'm really thinking, "You idiot.")

And of course, like any normal female, I thought about my own situation. Wouldn't it be fun to throw a big wedding party and have everyone partake in this special day? Tons of fun! And footing the bill? Not so fun. Before I wax too philosophical, I guess the question is: Do you feel the need to share your special day with friends and family, or is it sufficient to keep it between the two people involved? Of course, this explodes into a big political debate involving a prolific guest list, hurt feelings, and managing expectations. I've been told several times that the wedding isn't really for the bride as it is for her mother.

I once told my mother that I wanted to elope so I didn't have to deal with the work/stress/politics of a wedding. Kind of an all or nothing deal. As she was driving, I could see the corners of her mouth straighten into a perfectly thin line. Yeah, so that didn't go very well. Scratch that. I'm partial to the idea of a destination wedding because chances are, people are going to have to travel, so why not go somewhere fun and interesting?

I'm getting ahead of myself.

I can't even focus enough to pack my gym back the night before, let alone stay awake past 10:30pm. Entering delirium, so ta-ta for now.

posted by v @ 7:07 PM